The older I get, the more I become aware of how our perceptions and priorities change as we journey through life. Our daily joys and woes shape us over time in ways we may not even notice, but bigger events in life, both the wonderful and the awful, can have a more tangible impact and may leave us feeling irreversibly changed. You’re still you, but you’re a slightly different you.
Becoming a parent did that for me; I was no longer just me, I was me plus my twins. And more recently, with the loss of my mum; I am now me, minus my mum.
In my experience, the often intense emotions associated with big life events can make it difficult to concentrate or give energy to other areas. Some things may have to take a back seat or be dialed down as much as life will allow, for a while at least. I felt like this in both the happy and sad situations above, especially in the last few months.
Grief has left me a bit lost; it’s been harder to focus and my procrastination nemesis has often crept in. I guess my work mojo has taken a bit of hit and I’ve not felt like ‘putting myself out there’.
I generally listen to my instinct to guide me in tough situations, but even this seemed to have been drifting off elsewhere. Then in the last couple of weeks, I have found myself wanting to write, a cathartic choice for me, so perhaps that is my instinct re-engaging!
I mostly write about things relating to careers and work life, but my coaching approach has always been holistic and so my posts sometime reflect this. We have “one wild and precious life” and our careers do not exist in isolation from this, whether things feel bright, steady state or rocked by the big stuff.
Picture: hanging the metal fish that used to be in my mum’s garden and is now in our tree.